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>>Subject: Your sausage will become huger than ever before.


Negs: I thought we were done with these.

Liz: I found another one.

Megavolt: Sausage is good with eggs.

Amy: Oh this will be a good one, I just know it.


>>Making love is always pleasant 


Liz: Sure is.

Negs: Damn straight.

QJ: Its alright.

Liz: Alright?

QJ: I mean, its great.

Amy: QJ would rather play with toys.


>>especially when the girl you love screams 


QJ: Liz doesn't scream, but she gets loud sometimes.

Liz: I'm gonna hit you with something.

Negs: I've got a crowbar.

Reg: Why do you always find the most perverted emails?

Liz: I purposely search for them.


>>from a great satisfaction that she achieves while your tool gets inside the deepest parts of her flower!


Liz: Now I'm picturing someone violating a rosebush with a wrench.

Amy: Sounds kinky.

Reg: Leave the poor roses alone.


>>According to the statistics 


Licky: That we just made up on the spot.

Liz: I have a pie chart.

QJ: I made a graph


>>some close relations bring people together 


Liz: Duh, thats how you bring people together.

Negs: I don't do close relations.

Amy: Negs is the bed 'em them dump 'em type.

Liz: I was gonna say bed 'em then kill 'em.

Negs: Nah I just dump 'em.


>>better than any soul relations and inner world. 


Negs: I have an inner world. Its my happy place where I'm not putting up with you knobs or being forced to read this crap.

Liz: Isn't that what the Negaverse is for?

Negs: Yeah but I can't be there all the time.

Reg: Soul relations seem like they'd be pretty close.

Liz: QJ and I pledged our souls to each other.

QJ: We did?

Liz: Yeah what do you think that whole ceremony was for, just for the fun of it?


>>That’s why it comes obvious that if you want to conquer


Negs & Liz: St. Canard.

Negs: *blinks* You just keep trying to get on my good side.

Liz: You don't have a good side.

Negs: True.


>>the girl’s heart you ought to be a monster in her bed.


QJ: Monsters belong under the bed and in closets.

Megavolt: Why would you want a monster in your bed.

Negs: Amy are you not teaching him about the birds and the bees?

Amy: I don't want to confuse him too much.


>>Every girl love large tools, 


Liz: Not true, motion of the ocean. 

Amy: Yeah, bigger isn't always better.

Licky: Well these companies do seem to stay in business. Maybe I should look into the male enhancement market.

Liz: I don't even want to know what your ads would be like.

Reg: Full of fake schemes, just like this one.


>>so that’s time for you to look at your device 


Negs: Which one? I got a chainsaw, a shotgun, a crowbar, several knives.

Liz: Not those devices, Negs.

Megavolt: I'm not following any of this.

Negs: Seriously Amy, teach him something.

Reg: One of us should stay innocent.

Liz: El isn't innocent, hes just not bright.

Megavolt: If you plug me into the wall I am.

Amy: *sighs*


>>and decide whether you are able to satisfy your girlfriend or not.


Liz: Because simply looking at your device is the best way to tell if you can satisfy a woman.

Negs: Its never failed me before.

Liz: Negaduck, no one wants to know about your device.

Negs: Not what I hear, huh Lizzy?

Liz: *blushes* Shut up.


>>Obviously your tool is not that big 


Negs: I beg to differ.

Megavolt: I've got a pretty big pipe wrench at the light house.

Licky: Megavolt; Totally Clueless since 1975.

Amy: Its best if he stays that way.


>>to provide the wonderful pleasure


Liz: Of gardening and home improvement.

QJ: That reminds me, we need more fuses.

Liz: Did El mess with the fuse box again.

Megavolt: Nah, I just tried to charge my battery and it used too much power.

Liz: Figures.


>>and you are risking for your girl to break up with you. 


Liz: QJ I'm leaving you for someone with a bigger pipe wrench.

Negs: How about a crowbar?

Liz: I will pass.

Negs: Not what I hear.

Liz: Amy I'm gonna kill you.

Amy: He threatened me.


>>So, hurry up to change your lifestyle and inner look. 


QJ: Can these pills change your inner look too?

Amy: Apparently they can turn you into a whole new person.

Liz: They also cure most STDs and can help you learn a new language in only thirty days.

Licky: And they can be yours for the low, low price of $29.99.


>>Our enlargement pills are definitely what you need to take in, 


Liz: Your mouth, I hope. 

QJ: Could be suppositories.

Amy: Gross.

Reg: Do people actually buy this stuff?

Liz: Only desperate men.

Amy: Ah, so Negaduck.

Negs: Woman, I will kill you.


>>in order to keep stable relations or make them tighter.


Amy: How do these pills make anything tighter?

Liz: Well if the device is big enough...

Megavolt: Wait a minute, I think I get it now. This is an add for plumbing.

Amy: Close, dear, close.

Negs: If you don't tell him, I will.

Liz: Because you're the best person to give that kind of talk.

Negs: I'll have you know, I've got a lot of experience.

Liz: I didn't need to know that.

Negs: Are you SURE, Liz?

Liz: Shut the fuck up.


>>All the information about our enlargement pills


Licky: Was made up off the top of our heads.

Liz: Right this second.

QJ: They also make wives play with your toys.

Liz: Not those toys, sweetheart.

Negs: If I hear one more word about your sex life, I will shoot both of you.


>>and the effect they may give you


Amy: Swelling

Liz: Fever

Reg: Rashes

Negs: Severe rectal bleeding.

Liz: Ew!

Licky: If erection lasts more than four hours, consult your nearest doctor.


>>is available at our site.


Liz: www.fakecrap.com

Amy: I was gonna say www.bigpeen.com

Negs: I should put that domain name on hold.

Liz: Thats more information that anyone needs, Negsy.

Negs: Oh, I know you're just dying to know more.

Liz: I will use your own chainsaw on you.

Megavolt: What does any of this have to do with sausage?

Amy: *sighs*


-Finis-


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